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Versus - Gamer Edition: Hardcore v. Casual
Written by Tom Dalis on Monday, February 25, 2008
Two will enter, but only ONE will leave. Well, ok... they'll both leave. But only ONE will leave VICTORIOUS...
"Hardcore" gamers have been around as long as there have been video games. Remember the kid growing up whose parents bought him an actual Galaga sit-down arcade machine or the dude at lunch who told everybody that there was a code to make the Dead Or Alive chicks play volleyball naked? Yep, they were hardcore gamers. Of course, if you were the kids who pelted that particular lunch table with orange rinds and sandwich crusts, you are firmly entrenched in the demographic now known as "casual" gamers, a term that has come into vogue in the last few years to describe those who have a passing interest in video games and may buy a few games a year or jump on a particularly hot trend in gaming.
Hardcore gamers, especially on the internet, scoff at casuals, while casuals usually do their scoffing in real life. Now, for once and forever, let's decide which group is superior... or just make fun of both terms; either way is good.
Market Share
Nintendo could tell you a few things about this category. Marketing their products to a wider demographic has placed them firmly as the leader this generation in both handheld and console sales. It is clear that most people just aren't interested in slogging through one hundred-hour long role playing games or memorizing a chart to be able to throw a virtual punch. Casual gamers just want to blow some crap up and gape at the pretty graphics, or invest only a few minutes a day in something they feel will benefit them in some way other than a deeper understanding of the complex Terran/Zerg diplomatic relationship. Really though, when you think of it, the term "casual gamer" is pretty all-encompassing. It's anybody who doesn't regularly listen to a video game podcast or have a favorite Mario Brothers enemy. So basically: everybody. Good luck against those odds hardcore gamers.
Winner: Casual by like fifteen million copies of Nintendogs.
Gaming Knowledge
Obviously, hardcore gamers know a lot about games. That's kind of what makes them "hardcore". They can tell you about that import-only gem you have never heard of, like Metal Gunslinger or Toyrobo Force. They can drop interesting videogame trivia at the drop of a hat (note: actual level of interest may vary). For example, did you know that Sonic has enough creepy anthropomorphic friends to field a softball team? That's probably true and definitely weird. And there's the rub: many hardcore gamers take their videogame knowledge to scary and obsessive lengths.
Do I need to know Chun-Li's thigh diameter in both metric and English units of measurement? Casual gamers on the other hand only really know about games that are widely publicized via marketing, media hype/controversy, or strong word of mouth. While this means you don't have to listen to them blather on about some overlooked eight-bit platformer featuring a spunky Japanese ninja who is also a demon who is also a robot who is also a motorcycle, it also means you have to listen to them blather on about how Halo 3 is like, totally such a badass game and like, the best game ever made and like, Microsoft gave Steven Spielberg a hundred million dollars to make Halo awesome! They also like to get facts wrong which infuriates hardcore gamers to no end; something I approve wholeheartedly.
Winner: Hardcore by a thigh millimeter.
Gaming Skills
Come on now. There is an actual professional league devoted to the most hardcore of hardcore first-person-shooter players. Is there a league set up for brutal, intense, head to head Brain Training competitions? Actually there is; it's called third grade. It's easy, trust me: I beat it twice.
Winner: Hardcore by a qcb x2 + PPP
Personal Hygiene
Have you seen those Wii commercials? Apparently, good looking people play videogames. They probably smell pretty good and wash their hair at least semi-regularly. Hardcore gamers smell like Doritos and shame. They think a B.O. problem is what happens when Donatello loses his weapon in TMNT: Turtles in Time. And if you told that to a hardcore gamer, they would scream right back, "Idiot! Donatello CAN'T lose his weapon in Turtles in Time!" I bet their breath would be terrible.
Winner: Casual by a stick of Degree for Men.
Overall Winner
It's a tie! Whoever wins, we all lose.
